Long ago, when she had been so hurt and hopeless, the only place she felt she would ever belong was in the kitchen at her lady’s manor. And then in her lady’s solar, where quiet words passed between them and every shameful thing was accepted with compassion.

What she would not give to be there now. It was so far away that it almost felt like part of a fable, impossible to reach, the whole breadth of England between this place and that one. She imagined it – the manor at Dinwen, the wide hearth in the kitchen and the peace of the lord and lady’s chamber. The ground would be covered in bluebells now, the kitchen garden newly planted, perhaps even a tree chosen to become the May pole already. And her lady would be there, full of wisdom and comfort and silent understanding.

It was far, but so was Morency. And what did distance matter? There was nowhere else she could imagine herself, and nowhere else she wanted to be. She would go.

As soon as her mind settled on it, a great exhaustion washed over her. Now she could sleep. She did not even care that it was daylight, and she had never in full health been idle while the sun was in the sky. She pulled the dress over her head, almost welcoming the scratch of the coarse wool against her naked skin. She fastened the belt over it so that she would have her blades at hand. She ignored common sense, leaving her linen dripping on the tub and her hair wet, and lay down on the bed under her cloak.

Fuss came to sit just below where she lay her head, wanting to be near her but knowing better than to jump onto the mattress.

“You will like Wales, Fuss,” she mumbled as she allowed herself to drift to sleep.

Long after the sun had set and the household was settled to sleep, Gryff found her in the yard where only a few nights ago she had entertained them with her skill. It was the silence that had called him to her, for there was no sound of blades landing. She stood in the night, illuminated by the lamp set midway between her and the post. There was a dagger in her hand but she only held it indifferently as she stared at the post with a blank look.

“Nan,” he said, but she made no acknowledgement of him. Not even a glance in his direction.