“Should you?” Nick countered, stepping closer to me. “Tell me one thing first, Sawyer. Why is it that you feel everything else so deeply, that you love everyone else in your life—from your grandmother and Lily to godforsaken Campbell Ames—so loyally and so fiercely, but you can’t even admit to a moment of jealousy when it comes to me?”

My mouth felt dry all of a sudden. My skin was humming. “It wasn’t jealousy,” I said.

It was a warning of all the ways this thing between us could go south.

I made myself turn back to the shore, take one step away from him and then another.

“You told me once,” Nick said quietly, “that after your grandfather died, your mother started wearing all black, and your aunt ran away.”

That was just random enough that I found myself able to stop and reply. “For almost a year.”

Nick strode toward me. I could hear him walking, but I didn’t turn back around until he stopped, right behind me.

“You think you’re like your mother,” he told me. “And that Lily’s like hers, but you’ve got that backward. She’s the one who turns things in on herself. You’re the one who runs.”

The tone in his voice was mild, but the intent in those words was not. You’re the one who runs.

“No, I’m not,” I said sharply. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

I was still living with my mother’s family, even though things had pretty much gone to hell. I was here—with him—now.

I’m not running. I’m not scared.

As if in response to the words I’d just thought, he brought his hands to my face, then ran them through my hair. He kissed me, rough this time, in a way that banished every other thought from my mind. Count to seven. His touch turned gentle. His lips pulled away from mine and, moments later, brushed lightly against them again.

And then he spoke. “You’re so afraid of being left, you live life with one foot out the door. That’s why you won’t call Lily on the way she’s been acting, even though you’re worried about her. Hell, that’s why you wanted to find Ana’s baby in the first place. Pregnancy Pact Baby Number Two is your backup plan. Backup family.”

“That’s not true,” I said.

“Really?” Nick brushed his lips lightly over mine again. “Then why won’t you tell Lily how worried you are?” He looked at me in a way that left me no choice about looking back. “Why were you so quick to believe that Jessi was something other than my sister just now?”

“I’m not having this conversation with you.” I pressed my lips to his. He kissed me back but only for a moment.