"Everyone who knows would like the answer to that," Bev said, her eyes concerned. "Mage talents require seeing the world in a totally different way than Mechanics do. Not even traces of Mage talent should be possible alongside Mechanic skills. You having both is inexplicable and…"

"Scary," Kira finished. "One more example of me being a freak."

"You're not a freak."

"Then why are Mother and Father being so different the last few years? I can't explain it, but I can feel it. The way they look at me sometimes these days. It's like they think I'm a bomb that could explode at any time."

"I imagine most parents of teenage girls feel that way," Bev commented.

"Bev, I'm not her. I'm never going to change the world."

Bev sighed. "Everybody knows you're not Mari."

"No, I'm not!" Kira looked down at the grass, misery rising in her. "I'm sixteen. When my mother was sixteen she qualified as a full Mechanic. Youngest person ever. And when she was eighteen she qualified as a Master Mechanic. Youngest person ever. You know what everyone is already thinking. Every time they look at me and see her they think it. Soon they're going to start saying it. Asking me when I'm going to slay some dragons and raise an army and free the world like she did! Asking me what I'm going to do with my life that could match that!"

Bev looked down as well, grimacing. "You know that your mother and father never thought of themselves as heroes. Still don't. Your mother doesn't spend time remembering doing great things. She remembers her mistakes and the people who got hurt. The last thing she wants is for you to experience anything like that."

"I wouldn't know," Kira said, hearing the resentment in her voice. "She never talks about that stuff with me."

Bev's sigh carried a lot of weight. "Kira, it's hard to explain. There are some things that are very hard to talk about, even a long time later. Your mother still has nightmares."

"Yeah," Kira said, upset with herself. "I hear her sometimes at night. That's one of my earliest memories, waking up, hearing my mother crying out and wanting to help."

"I'm sorry. Being in battles, having lots of people trying to kill you, seeing people die, that stuff doesn't just go away." Bev tapped her head. "It stays there, and sometimes it feels like it all just happened. Trust me on this. Your mother wants to tell you how it was. She can't. And she knows how being her daughter has made your life hard. She was really upset when we had to put you into private teaching when you were ten, but after we stopped that plot to blow up the school to get at you in order to hurt Mari, it was just too dangerous for the other kids to keep you there."