There was a sharp intake of breath, and at once, I felt ashamed. Awful. Monstrous. “Okay,” he said a few moments later. “What were you thinking?”

“I don’t know. I really wasn’t thinking anything.”

“You had to be thinking something, Ember.”

I shifted down, feeling for the coin in my pocket. Holding it my hand was kind of comforting. “I guess I was thinking about what you wanted me to do.”

“Okay. What else?”

“That’s all. I mean, I could’ve been thinking about other things, I guess.”

“Like what?” Hayden stood and walked toward the little kitchen area. In front of a large picture window, several plants basked in the fading sunlight. He picked a flower, one blooming with pretty, white and pink petals.

Closing my eyes, I forced myself to concentrate. “School. Olivia. The dead rabbit. Why Cromwell really has everyone here. Mom and Dad.” I paused, sliding a look at the bed. Never being able to touch someone. Dying a virgin. Was the pimple on my forehead still the size of a village? “All kinds of stuff.”

“Okay.” Hayden sat back down, and his knees once again pressed mine. “That’s a lot going on.”

I snorted. “Sorry.”

He grinned. “Try to empty all of that out. Get rid of it. When you aren’t thinking about anything, touch the plant again.”

I sighed. “It’s such a pretty flower.”

His lips twitched as if he fought a smile. “You ready?”

I shook my shoulders and tried not thinking about anything, but it was really hard. My brain spewed stuff out randomly, but I tried. When I thought my brain seemed appropriately empty, I leaned forward. The movement pressed our knees together even more. Crazy as it sounded, I swore I could feel the heat of his skin through the clothing, warming me.

“Ember?”

I ran my fingers over the plant. Like it was laughing in my face, the colorful blossoms went first. Pink and white petals broke off, and by the time they hit the soil, they’d turned brown. Ugh. I really was Death in sneakers.

“What were you thinking?” Hayden asked.

“Nothing.”

“We always have something running in the back of our thoughts. What’s running behind yours?”

Right now I was thinking about how nice his eyes looked, but I’d shave my head before I admitted that. “I don’t know. Nothing’s running in the background.”

Hayden placed the plant on the floor. His knee slipped from mine and ended up against my thigh. Fine shivers coursed down my legs.

“Try to concentrate, Ember. There is always a thought to every action. Like something on repeat.”

I really didn’t want to share the thought I had on repeat right now. My cheeks felt on fire. I don’t even know what was wrong with me, why I continued to think about him.

Hayden straightened, his knee sliding back. His eyes caught mine and sparked. “Let’s do this again.”

“Sure,” I stuttered.

We went on like this for a while. I’d kill another innocent plant. Hayden would ask what I was thinking. His leg would flirt with mine. I’d tell him I wasn’t thinking anything, and he would say something impossibly motivational.