There was so much self-loathing in his tone that it broke through my haze of anger and confusion. A part of me wanted to reach out to him, but there was still too much lingering unsaid between us. “We both betrayed him,” I said, my voice unsteady.

Cage shook his head, running his hands through his hair and standing it on edge in a familiar nervous gesture. “I appreciate the sentiment. But I’m the one who convinced you to lie about things. You were ready to tell the truth.”

I really hoped Mia believed that, because I had a sense she’d forgive Cage more readily than me. Instantly guilt suffused me. Here I was worrying about whether my newfound friends would be pissed off at me instead of about Cage, about Matt, about my approaching father, about any of the myriad of things that took precedence.

Friends. I paused at the word. Were these really my friends? We’d been thrown together by circumstance more than anything. Three weeks ago, we’d been enemies. They’d taken me hostage and threatened me, threatened my family. But then, my family had betrayed me too.

Friends. I’d never had friends before, not like this. Not people you loved and would die for. I glanced behind me at Reed and Imani, standing close together, their faces taut with worry, and almost choked on the desire to make that worry go away, to keep them safe. It clenched around my heart, sending blood to my cheeks and tremors to my hands, giving me both vulnerability and strength.

Friends.

“You all right?” Cage asked.

I’d never been much with words, especially when I had to speak them out loud. But . . . “Cage,” I said, staring at his chest under its flat green T-shirt, “I want you to know, whatever happens here . . .”

“Nothing’s going to happen to you,” he replied, his voice calm and assured, too calm and assured. It was the same tone he’d used to soothe the prisoners on Sanctuary. I was close enough to see through him now. “To any of us. We got off Sanctuary, and we’ll get through this.”

He’d misunderstood. I didn’t want reassurance. I wanted him: his fears and his lies and his truth and just all of him, every breath, every sigh. I wanted to surmount the obstacles between us, the lies and the death and the betrayal. He examined me, and something slipped in his confident mask, his exhaustion breaking through and giving me a glimpse of the heart of him. I lowered my eyes, searching for words. Somehow, I knew there was something I could say, now, in this moment, that would undo all the hurt, that would set things back to the way they used to be. I just had to find the words and the courage to speak them.

Suddenly Rune broke away from the console with a gasp. Her eyes fluttered open, and Cage flashed across the room to catch her before she fell. “You all right, meimei?”