“Sorry. Uh, how long until you run out of fuel?”

“At projected power usage, now that I’m more active, my current fuel will run out in seven to twelve thousand years.”

“Oh,” I rolled my eyes, “I’ll get right on it, then.”

"It's not so funny to me."

"Sorry." Seven thousand years was not long for him, considering. "I got to tell you, Skippy, I don't know what to do next. I don't even know what side of this war we should be on. Humans, I mean."

“I can’t advise you about which side of the war you should be on, I’m neutral. I’m above all this, to me you’re all just bugs fighting over crumbs on a sidewalk.”

“Thank you for being so helpful.”

“Actually, I can help you with that. Let’s take this month’s Cosmo cover quiz, entitled “Is he the Right One for you to go to war with’?”

“I’m not taking a stupid Cosmo quiz!”

Skippy ignored me. “Come on, it’ll be fun and educational. First question; should species with less advanced technology be allowed to develop on their own, or should they be conquered because they’re weak?”

“Oh, I thought you meant-” Maybe Skippy was going to be serious for a minute. “I’ll take Noninterference for $200, Alex.”

“You’re mixing metaphors, this isn’t Jeopardy.”

“All right, I’ll play along. I’m against conquering, or being conquered.”

Skippy sniffed. “You know, sometimes a woman likes a bad boy.”

“Is this a Cosmo quiz, or is this about interstellar politics? Do the Ruhar and their allies conquer weaker species?”

“No.” Skippy sounded upset that I wasn’t letting it have fun. “The Jeraptha and Ruhar have known about your planet for a thousand years, as you’ve been on the edge of their territory, but they left you alone, except for stealth satellite surveillance. They only stepped in when the wormhole shift allowed the Kristang access to your miserable dirtball of a planet.”

Skippy had just confirmed the burgermeister told me the truth. “Then why haven’t the Ruhar stopped the lizards?”

“Because the other end of your local wormhole is in Kristang space, and the wormhole allows the Kristang to get to Earth in a couple short jumps by a Thuranin star carrier. The Ruhar don’t have a wormhole anywhere near your solar system, it takes them a lot of jumps to get there, and that supply line is impractical for a sustained campaign. Also, your planet isn’t important enough. The Kristang want Earth, but mostly they’re hoping to harass and distract the Ruhar, because now the Kristang have a foothold on the Ruhar’s flank.”

I considered what Skippy had said, it matched what the Burgermeister had told me. “Do the Ruhar kill prisoners of war, and civilians?”