The dilemma was making her head ache, and she was considering the need for a nap when a knock at the door startled her. She stuffed the letter beneath her pillow and quickly laid down, trying to make it look as if she’d already been relaxed before she called, “Come in.”

Kat entered and closed the door behind her. “Are you feeling all right?”

“Just a little tired,” Amala said. “For some reason I woke up very early and couldn’t go back to sleep. Nothing a nap won’t set right.”

“Are you certain?” Kat asked. “You just haven’t seemed quite yourself lately, and it seemed a little worse this morning. I’m worried about you.”

“I’m fine, truly,” Amala insisted.

“Well, I don’t believe you,” Kat said and sat next to Amala on the bed, leaning back against the headboard. “You’ve seemed especially sad since you made your declaration that you have no intention of ever marrying. It makes me wonder if you’ve really thought it through as carefully as you should.”

“I assure you that I’ve thought it through very carefully.”

“But you don’t want to talk about it at all,” Kat said.

“There are things you don’t ever want to talk about,” Amala countered. “I didn’t say my decision wasn’t difficult, but I believe it’s right.” She thought that prior to reading Henry’s letter she would have said that she knew it was right. Now, she mostly felt afraid—of her own feelings as much as of Henry’s. But she fought to keep her expression noncommittal and her emotions concealed. Doing so was easier with her eyes closed. She didn’t want to talk about it. The issue was simply something Kat could never fully understand. She was kind to a fault, but her way of thinking was often simple and limited, whereas Amala always felt the need to analyze everything to its core. She’d never tried to talk such things through with Kat for that very reason. She loved her sister dearly, but she accepted how very different they were.

When Kat changed the subject to talk of some gossip among the servants, Amala felt relieved, but Kat quickly tired of that topic and began speculating over the possibility of Chit and Henry coming to visit more frequently. Kat admitted she would like that very much; she was drawn to both men and would like to get to know them better, considering they each had fine qualities.

“I’m certain they are both fine men,” Amala said, still keeping her eyes closed.

She was about to reiterate her need for some sleep if only to put an end to the conversation, when Kat apologized for chattering, seeing that Amala was obviously tired. Kat pressed her usual sisterly kiss to Amala’s forehead and left the room. Amala was only alone for a minute before unexpected tears wet her closed lashes.