Henry saw her looking into his eyes, probing deeply for evidence that he truly meant what he was saying. He knew well enough that she could see right through him; he could never get away with lying to her. So he just gazed right back at her, giving her all the time she needed to accept the truth of what he’d just said, to know that he meant it. The very idea that she had been believing she should have died in Kat’s place made him feel ill. Did she truly see her own life as having so little value? For all of her outward confidence and determination to make the very best of her circumstances and live a fulfilling life, did she somehow believe what society may have conditioned her to believe, that she was somehow inferior? That she had less right to live than an English woman with fair skin? While he allowed her to search for the sincerity in his eyes, he saw the truth in hers. She did believe it. Somewhere in the deepest, most private places of Amala’s heart, she believed she was inferior, less than equal to even the members of her own family, who had done nothing but give her love and acceptance in every way.

Henry’s thoughts wandered boldly into territory that broke his own rules on the present situation. He couldn’t help it. He had to ask himself: Was that why she’d so adamantly refused to marry him? For all the logic and practicality of her reasoning over the difficulties it would have brought into their lives—and into the lives of their potential children—was the true heart of the problem her own perception of herself? For as long as he’d known her—and loved her—and for as well as they had grown to understand each other, Henry saw for the first time what life might really look like through the eyes of a young Indian woman, orphaned and transplanted to a place where she could never blend in and never be treated as an equal by the whole of the society in which she lived. His heart cracked in a way that made him momentarily forget about his own grief, and he felt tears slide down his face before he even felt their presence in his eyes.