5:53 p.m.

As guests walk up the long pebble driveway to the house, a line of French waiters in black Napoleon-collared jackets welcome us with French Blonde cocktails^*1 served in vintage Lalique stemware. Now that’s class.

6:09 p.m.

This place resembles the Puli Hotel, only much bigger. We are now inside the Bing Family Museum, and everywhere I look, I see Warhols, Picassos, and Bacons, and standing in front of them are some of China’s most fabulous living works of art: Lester Liu and his wife, Valerie, in a va-va-voom vintage Christian Lacroix pouf dress; Perrineum Wang sporting a Stephen Jones fascinator of glittery gold sunrays with a Sacai shredded dress; Stephanie Shi rockin’ it in royal blue Rochas; and Tiffany Yap as au courant as ever in Carven. Le tout Shanghai is here tonight!

6:25 p.m.

I just met Virginie de Bassinet, the chic founder of Prêt-à-Couture, who promises that we will be swooning in our seats when the fashion show starts. Carlton Bao just walked in with a pretty girl who looks a lot like him. Who could she be, and who is the hottie with them? OMG—is he that actor from the hit Korean TV series My Love from the Star?

6:30 p.m.

It’s not the guy from My Love from the Star. Turns out he’s some history professor friend of Carlton’s visiting from New York. How disappointing.

6:35 p.m.

Lester and Valerie Liu are standing in the gallery where some beautiful antique scrolls hang, and Valerie is sobbing on Lester’s shoulder. Whatever could be wrong?

6:45 p.m.

In the garden now, where seats have been arranged along the sides of an immense reflecting pool. Could this garden actually be air-conditioned? We’re in the middle of a June heat wave, and yet I feel a cold draft blowing and detect the scent of honeysuckle.

6:48 p.m.

There are iPads on every seat, with a special app installed so we can view close-ups of each outfit as it comes down the runway and place our bids. Now this is useful technology!

6:55 p.m.

Everyone awaits the arrival of Colette and Pan TingTing. What will they be wearing?

7:03 p.m.

Colette just made her entrance, with Richie Yang rushing up to take her arm and escort her to her seat. (Are the rumors that they are back together true?) This is what Colette has on: a Dior Couture daffodil strapless gown with a striking see-through panel at the thigh, worn with ridiculously sexy red Sheme heels that feature a heavily beaded snake winding around her ankles. You’re reading about it here FIRST, before she has time to blog about it herself!

7:05 p.m.

Roxanne Wang, Colette’s fabulous assistant, who is just killing it in a Rick Owens DRKSHDW black denim suit, just informed me that the beading on the snake is actually rubies. I DIE!!!!

7:22 p.m.

Still waiting for Pan TingTing, who is more than an hour late. We’re being told that her plane has just landed from London, where she has been filming some top-secret new movie with director Alfonso Cuarón.