When Matt showed up, he and Grayson retreated to his office. Parker came downstairs. She saw the closed office door and walked directly into my arms with quiet tears streaming down her face. I managed to get her over to the couch where I held her and let her cry. I didn’t know when I started crying but I didn’t even care. We needed this cleansing. When her sobs subsided and she sat upright, she gave me a sad smile.

“I’m so sorry. For everything.” She touched my face and wiped my tears away. Parker was a pretty crier. I ended up with splotches on my skin. The only visible sign that she had been crying was red-rimmed eyes.

“So open marriage really meant he got to keep his relationship with Matt, more or less?” I asked. She nodded. “How long has this been going on?”

“On and off since college. Matt is a great guy. He’s wonderful with the girls. I think that’s made it so much harder on Grayson because he can see what his life could look like.”

“And that’s why he pushed for divorce?” I asked.

“That’s why he agreed to one,” she said.

“It was your idea?”

“Yes.” She put her hand on my thigh. “The last few months have been really confusing for me. Reconnecting with you, seeing Grayson so happy. I’ve felt trapped for so long. I don’t want to feel that way anymore.”

I put my hand over hers. “Don’t take this wrong, but why on earth did you marry him knowing he cared so much for somebody else?” I left myself out of the equation. Now wasn’t the time.

She looked defeated. “I can’t tell you the last good decision I made on my own.”

I wanted more of an explanation, so I waited.

“I was young, and my parents had raised me to be a certain way. My whole life I’d been told homosexuality was a sin. And when I met you, I knew there was no way the feelings I had for you were wrong. When my parents split us up, I was too young and naive to realize I could’ve done things on my own. By the time I realized that, I’d lost you and Grayson. The only thing I had left to keep me going was my children.”

“Why didn’t you divorce sooner?” Why was I doling out relationship advice when I had failed so hard at every one I ever had?

“I didn’t want to risk Grayson’s reputation. He worked hard and he always gave me everything I wanted. Don’t get me wrong. Grayson and I have been best friends for years. This hasn’t been a loveless marriage. It’s just been a sexless one. For me at least,” she quickly added.