I wish I could say she’s just putting on a show for me, but she made that exact same sound when I was inside her. It’s not fake. It’s not for my benefit. It’s because Shiloh is doing something to her that is driving her out of her mind.

I should walk away and come back in the morning. Standing here and listening to them is an exquisite form of torture. Jealousy sinks its barbs into me and digs deep. That Monroe has caught Shiloh’s interest boggles my mind. That Shiloh seems to soften some of Monroe’s edges… I don’t know what to think about that, either. It’s as if my brain simply cannot compute it. Both women have clear roles in my life, for better or worse, and they’re acting against those expectations.

“Broderick?”

I open my eyes to find my older brother standing there. Being back in Sabine Valley agrees with Abel. He’s lost a little of the tightness in his shoulders that I thought a permanent fixture. Sure enough, I can see Eli over his shoulder. The man is typing away at something on his phone, his handsome face lit with the screen, but his proximity has my brother softening even if his attention is obviously on something else. There’s no other explanation for it.

Abel’s…happy.

I should be happy for him. He deserves happiness after everything he’s sacrificed to keep us alive and together. If it were just Harlow, it wouldn’t be a problem. She’s fierce, and she obviously cares a great deal about this faction and the people in it. I suspect she’s just as ruthless as Abel, but she still provides a bit of a counterweight to some of his ideas and plans.

But it’s not just Harlow.

He’s not part of a contented couple. He’s in a throuple, and the third person is Eli fucking Walsh. Even standing in the same space as Eli right now has me remembering how smoke coated my throat as we ran for our lives. I realize Eli wasn’t directly responsible, but damn if I can let it go. No matter what else is true, it’s been almost too easy to slip right back into our roles in the Raider faction.

As if nothing has changed, when the truth is that everything has changed.

Look at Abel, hardened to someone I barely recognize some days. And Ezekiel, who’s more monster than the sweet brother I once knew. Even Gabriel and Donovan have changed, and they’re the most easy-going of the seven of us.

I’ve changed too.