It takes me a beat longer to connect the dots. Shiloh hasn’t had any procedures since she joined up with us, especially something that would lay her out for a bit like that. Which meant it happened before, but she was only on her own for a little bit between us and…

Her parents did this to her.

Cold fury hits me in a wave. I open my mouth to demand confirmation that her parents truly took that choice from her, but she gives me a pleading look, stopping me short. “They didn’t do it to me. I bribed a doctor to tie my tubes when I was nineteen. I didn’t want…” She hesitates. “I would rather not talk about it.”

Maybe that should make me feel better, that she chose it for herself, but I can’t stop thinking about a nineteen-year-old version of my best friend going through that procedure alone, without any support, because she was so scared of continuing the legacy her parents forced on her. “Shiloh—”

“We don’t have to talk about it, love. You don’t have to justify your choice to either of us.” Monroe brushes Shiloh’s hair back from her face tenderly. She kisses her, soft and sweet, and gives her a nudge toward the bed. “Now lie down and spread your legs for me.”

As Shiloh moves on unsteady legs to obey, Monroe stalks to me and grabs a fistful of my shirt. “Get your head in the game,” she snarls, so low, I can barely hear her. “She doesn’t need either of our anger right now. Snap out of it.”

“Maybe it’s that easy for you, but it’s not for me.” I stare down at her. I have to look at Monroe, because if I look at Shiloh, I might fucking snap. “I can’t just shake off the knowledge that—”

“Shut. Up.” She gives me a shake. “Either take off your clothes and get ready to fuck us properly, or leave right now and I’ll do it alone.”

I want to yell that it’s not a fair choice to make, but… It is. It’s more than fair. Shiloh has made her needs very clear, and stopping everything to talk about something she obviously doesn’t want to talk about is the height of selfishness. Right now, all she wants is pleasure with none of the pain.

I can give her that.

I will happily work with the woman at my side to give her that. The woman who seems to see parts of Shiloh so much clearer than I do, who will happily fight to give her what she needs. In this moment, seeing the vicious look on Monroe’s face, the last of my lingering anger at her drains away, leaving something both soft and fierce in its wake.