“Nah. No one gets made into nothing they can’t be. I thought I was a soldier. They tried to make me into one, but…” He taps his medic tattoo. “I ain’t built like that.”

“I am. Dario let me see him, and when he did… I saw what I could be, and it’s this.”

He shakes his head, denying my truth as he tracks the patient’s pulse. “Keep the pressure.”

“I am like this. I’ll shoot you.” I’m not convincing myself, but the man on the table will convince Junior. “Maybe not for money or power, but for him. Dario.” I press down into the blood-soaked cloths until my hands are coated in blood. “He hurt me and hurt me again. He treated me like an animal because he hated me, but then… he didn’t mean to, but… he saved me. He opened me, and I saw the box I was living in, and he broke it. He smashed everything that made me feel safe and wanted and loved because I was none of those things. He put me on my own two feet, then he tried to build his own box around me.” The sight of my bloody hands is fogged with fresh tears. “But he couldn’t. There’s no box big enough to hold me now.”

Massimo wakes in the middle of the night. Junior’s sleeping in a booth in the dining room. I tried to nap. Couldn’t. I’ve only left Massimo long enough to get the shotgun from the car. It’s useless there.

What if I traded my life for Dario’s? That much is easy. But how do I make sure they let him go? And Dario would never allow it. He’ll rush back in.

The entire thing is a disaster.

“You’re meeting him.” Massimo’s whisper makes me gasp. “Sergio. I heard you.”

“Emo. How do you feel?”

“My leg hurts.” He tries to get up, but flops back down.

“Let me get Junior.”

“Not yet.” He grabs my arm with a surprisingly strong grip. “I have to talk to you.”

“Okay.” I sit. He seems relieved to let me go.

“You can’t meet him alone.”

“I can.” I correct him even though he’s right. I can’t let him make assumptions about my abilities anymore. “But I know I can’t trust him. There are too many ways for it to go bad. There’s the issue of making sure Dario gets out—”

“Never happen. He killed Dad.”

Five words shatter all of the worries of the last few hours. Worry is a luxury for times when things can go wrong. When everything’s already gone wrong, there’s nothing left to worry about.

Dario’s release isn’t going to happen. Not for Massimo’s return or whatever Sergio wants most in the world. It’s not up to one man. There’re a few hundred Colonia upset at the loss of their leader.

“And they’ll hollow me for defending him.”

“That’s over once I’m in charge. No hollowing. No more…” He swallows and makes a disgusted face. “Any of it. It’s going to stop. Immediately. First, I go with you. You’ll be safe.”