Paulie greeted the extended hand with a boxed juicerator. "Please pay the cashier."

"Paulie..." Chubby reached into his back pocket and pulled out a birthday card. "Look, forget comin' home." He placed the card on the demonstration counter. "Just sign this card."

Paulie glanced down.

As you get older, year by year
My love for you grows, father dear
And on this day that your life had begun Accept this gift of love from me, your son.

"Get out of here!" His eyes bulged, his voice a strangled whisper.

Chubby whipped out his wallet and slid two twenties under Paulie's hand. "Just sign it. I swear to Christ you'll never see me again!" Chubby felt like his guts were being kneaded by brutal hands.

Paulie stepped out of Chubby's reach. The unsigned card and the two twenties lay like a cryptic still life on the counter. "Jim, you want to take care of this gentleman?"

Chubby left slowly, feeling every ounce of his three hundred pounds weighing him down.

"Hey, Chubby," Paulie drawled. Chubby turned. "You see my old man, you tell him he's a grandfather."

***

"Hey! Hey! Whatta you doin'?" Banion shouted, craning his neck over the bar as one of the regulars hung the "closed" sign and locked the door.

"HAPPY BUR-THDAYY TOO YOOO," twenty-five guys started singing. Someone hit the lights and Tommy and Ray Buckley emerged from the back room carrying an enormous birthday cake lit with forty-seven candles. Banion sat speechless in the flickering shadows. They placed the cake on the counter and everybody crowded around the bar.

"Blow 'em out!"

It took Banion four long puffs to get all the candles. Shouts and cheers. Somebody turned the lights back on. Somebody opened the john door and Big Dave Stern came whirring out in a brand-new, fully motorized, thickly upholstered, snakeskin wheelchair. He whirred right up the platform and parked next to Banion, whose eyes were popping out of his head. Dave got out of the wheelchair and with Chubby's help lifted Banion into his birthday present. Banion was in shock. All he could do was sit there stroking the material on the seat and armrests.

"Hey, Banion! Banion! Feel under the seat! Hey, Banion!"

Banion finally looked up. His face was smeared with tears.

"Feel under the seat!"

Banion poked around under the seat and found a snub-nosed .38 with "THE BOUNCER" neatly printed in white on the barrel. Everybody cheered again. Banion let the gun lay on the flat of his palm.

"Hey, watch it. It's loaded!"

"There's a holster sewn on down there."

"Yeah. Don't fart. You'll get shot in the ass!"

Everybody laughed.

Banion felt for the holster and replaced the gun. He sat with his elbows on the armrests, his hands covering his face.

"Banion, ah, you think we might get a drink on the house?"

"You fuckin' guys." He wiped away his tears as Tommy and Chubby moved behind the bar and started serving drinks. He shook his head and laughed. "You fuckin' guys."