This never would have happened to Warren. He would have known exactly what to say to make the vampires believe him and to make Anya agree to keep searching for answers. Jonathan struggled to imagine how Warren would respond to this situation. He would have been effortlessly authoritative, cool, and threatening. Like Magneto.

“We paid you!” Jonathan said, prodding Anya in the shoulder. “You promised us a Wish, and you promised your supervisor you’d look for the gem.”

“And I looked,” Anya said, exasperated. Her beer glass clinked against the bar. White froth sloshed over the rim. “We followed our lead, boys. I’m done playing detective. As long as that little girl has the Marnoxon gem, I have no magic. That means no portal-hopping, no telekinesis, no Wish-granting. I’m basically as useless as you two. Except prettier. And with the good wristband. All I can do is wait and see if the slayer makes any more trouble in Demondale. But if I were her, I would cruise into a pocket dimension where slayers are queen shit of the universe and stay there.”

Onstage, the music was cut off by a bloodcurdling wail. Thrashing in the fabric of her own skirt, the vampire singer fell to the floor. The microphone landed with a thud beside her, amplifying her horrified, helpless keening. Rose petals shredded to mulch in her hands. Screams rent the air as her face flickered between vampire and human guises, both contorted into masks of abject despair.

In an instant, Spike was jumping over the bar. One of his leather motorcycle boots kicked over Anya’s beer moments before he shoved past Jonathan and Andrew. Audience members flew against the walls as Spike bum-rushed the stage screaming “Dru!”

“Time,” the vampire girl shrieked between sobs. “Time is dying!”

“Don’t mind Drusilla,” Angelus told Anya. He shook out a towel and mopped up her spilled beer. “Just one of her fits. That’s the trouble with having an insane clairvoyant in the house band. It’s my own fault.”

“Did you know she was insane when you hired her?” Andrew asked. Jonathan fought the urge to clamp his hand over his friend’s mouth. If Andrew could tamp down his undead curiosity for a minute, the vampire girl’s freak-out would have been the perfect cover for the two of them to sneak out of the Bronze unnoticed. But Andrew couldn’t help himself. Vampires were his current chief obsession, taking the top slot from Legend of Zelda and the Star Wars expanded universe. He just couldn’t shut up about them when the opportunity presented itself. No matter how dangerous that opportunity might be.

“Of course I knew,” Angelus said. He blinked rapidly, seemingly perplexed by the question. “I’m the one who tortured the sense out of her.”

Jonathan felt faint. He dug his fingernails into his palms, doing his best to stay alert. If he lost consciousness, there was no way he’d live long enough to leave the club.

Angelus glanced over at Anya. “Can I pour you another Black Frost?”