“Not without my sister, and not until I make sure you don’t go and get yourself killed. I might be furious with you right now, Blake, but I know you are trying to be a hero. I’m not a damsel in distress. I’m an FBI agent. You have my back. I have your back. That’s how this works. That’s how it is.”

She hit the big nerve, the raw, throbbing, aching one he wished he could just bury in the hell of his past, and Blake snapped. He grabbed her and took her down on the bed, covering her body with his, fighting a memory that was sure to shred him to pieces. “Don’t say that to me again,” he growled. “Not ever again. Do you understand me?”

Pain sliced through her eyes. “Right,” she said, her voice quavering. “Translation. You want a fuck buddy and nothing more. No partner. No…whatever else. Just a fuck buddy who goes away when you want her to go away. Check. Check. Get off me.”

Her hurt cut through the adrenaline and pain eating away at him, and then it punched in the chest. He didn’t want to get off of her. He didn’t want to hurt her. He didn’t want her to go away. “I’m sorry,” he breathed out. “Kara…I’m sorry.” He lowered his forehead to hers. “I am getting this all wrong. I’m just trying to keep you alive.”

Her fingers curled on his cheek. “I’d rather have you by my side, helping me. I’d rather not be alone in this anymore, Blake. Don’t make me be that again.”

Alone. He felt the ache in that word when she said it. Her family was dead. Her sister was missing. He wanted to make it better for her. He would. He’d get her sister back, no matter what that meant. “I’m the wrong person to count on.”

“Because you expect to die.”

“Because I’m willing.”

“I’m willing. There’s a difference between being willing to die and wishing you were dead.”

He inhaled sharply and lifted his head to look at her. She saw too much and he saw no point in denying the truth. “And that’s why you’re a problem, Kara. You make me want to live again and damn it, that’s dangerous.” Too dangerous. He had to find his control again. He had to do it now.