Thomas sighed and then lifted my arm to take a look. “Your knee?” he asked, leaning down.

I held out the one that had crashed against the floor, and he inspected it.

“I am a grade-A fuck-up,” he said, rubbing his wet hair.

“I’m not giving you much to work with.” I let my cheeks fill with air, and then I exhaled.

After several seconds of uncomfortable silence, I left him alone in the bathroom to retrieve my toothbrush, and then I returned. Thomas unscrewed the cap off of the tube of toothpaste. I held out my brush, and he squeezed out a short line onto the bristles and then did the same for his.

We held our brushes under the water and then stared into the mirror of his high school bathroom, wearing thin floral towels, while brushing our teeth together over the same sink. It felt like such a domestic thing to do, and at the same time, the past ten minutes had been so awkward that it was hard to enjoy it.

I leaned over to rinse and spit, and Thomas did the same. He chuckled and used his finger to wipe a speck of toothpaste from my chin, and then he gently cupped his hands on my cheeks. His smile faded.

“I admire your ability to scrutinize every detail, but why do you have to dissect this?” he asked, unhappy. “Why can’t we just try?”

“You’re not over Camille, Thomas. You made that clear tonight. And you just asked me to promise to stay with you in San Diego. That’s a promise we both know I can’t and won’t keep. It’s completely reasonable for you to want something stable after what happened to you, but I can’t promise that I won’t continue to work my way up the federal ladder.”

“What if I give you assurances?” he asked.

“Like what? And don’t tell me it’s love. We met last month.”

“We’re not like everyone else, Liis. We spend every day together—sometimes, all day and then evenings and even weekends. If we’re keeping track, we’ve put in the time.”

I thought about that for a moment.

“Stop overthinking it. You want assurances? This is not guesswork for me, Liis. I loved someone before, but the way I feel about you…it’s that feeling, a thousand times over.”

“I have feelings for you, too. But feelings aren’t always enough.” I chewed on my lip. “I’m worried that if we don’t work out, the job will be miserable. That’s impossible for me to accept, Thomas, because I love my job.”

“I love mine, too, but being with you is worth the risk.”

“You don’t know that.”