“Quiet, it’s my dad!” he shouted. Then, more quietly, “Yeah, I’m here. I gotta come home already? You only dropped me off here like half an hour ago.”

“No, you don’t have to come home. I was wondering how late you could stay there.”

“You want me to stay here?”

“Long as you want. Any chance you could sleep over?”

“On a school night?”

Since when did my children become so concerned about staying up late on a school night?

“Yeah, sure, it’s okay. Angie’s going to stay with somebody, and it only seemed fair to offer you the same opportunity.”

“Who is this, really?”

“It’s your father, Paul.”

“So I get reamed out by my science teacher, and for punishment, I get to stay out all night? If I told you I’m failing math, too, would there be money for me and Andy to get hookers?”

“I was just telling Angie, it’s your mother’s birthday in a couple of days, and I think she’s going to be home from work soon.” A lie. A total lie. “And I wanted to make her arrival extra special.”

There was silence for a moment on the other end of the line. Then, echoing his sister: “Oh gross.” Just how did teenagers think their parents brought them into the world, anyway?

“So do you think you can stay there?” I asked.

“Hang on, I’ll check.” He covered the mouthpiece, and I could hear a muffled exchange in the background. Paul came back on the line: “Yeah, it’s cool. But I didn’t bring over any stuff.”

“What do you need?”

“Like, a toothbrush? And another shirt, but not something you’d like, but a T-shirt, just grab something that’s on my floor. And could you grab my pillows? You know how I can’t sleep on strange pillows. And my comforter. I’ll probably be sleeping on the basement couch, and I don’t know how many blankets they’ve got.”

I grabbed a pen by the phone and started to make a list.

“And my hairbrush? I don’t want to use somebody else’s hairbrush. Oh, and some toothpaste? I don’t think Andy’s family has mint toothpaste. And I guess some underwear. I don’t need pajamas, though. I’ll just sleep in my clothes.”

“Anything else?” I asked, trying to hold back the sarcasm.

“I don’t think so. It’s just the one night.”

“I’ll drop this off in a while,” I said. “I have some other things I have to do first.”

“Okay. See ya later.”

Angie came into the kitchen and I handed her Paul’s list. “Can you gather those things up for your brother?”

She scanned it. “His comforter? What about his teddy bear? Should I pack that, too?”

“Just do it, okay?”