She nodded elegantly and strongly.

*    *    *

It was close to dawn when Mizuo and I left Tanaka's shop.

I questioned him as we walked. “So how long was I actually unconscious?”

“About two hours. We drank as we waited—and boy, am I drunk!”

Mizuo's voice echoed loudly in the deserted alley.

“Really? Was it that long?”

I'd only been with Haru for a few moments, so I was surprised to hear this. All the same, I was feeling cool and relaxed. The light of the moon and stars was incredibly vivid, so brilliant it seemed as if they'd been washed, and it felt like I hadn't seen them so bright in years. It made me feel happy just to walk, and my pace sped up all on its own. Haru, an angel's song, the midget medium, Haru. . . .

“But that's fine. As long as you feel better,” Mizuo said suddenly, and then put his arm around my shoulder. “For now, don't think.”

I nodded without saying anything.

Did I just happen to get drunk every night?

Was Haru always somewhere close by?

Was that beautiful song Haru trying to call me?

Where did I go just now at the shop?

Who was that midget? Why is he able to do that?

Was that really Haru? Even though she's dead?

Or was it just a one-person play acted out inside me?

And then Haru made her exit, and I was left alone.

Greater than all the mysteries, a calm evening breeze slid through me, cleansing me.

“I kind of feel like, starting tomorrow, I won't be drinking that much. I wonder if I've been doing it on purpose,” I said. “But I don't know . . . it really seems like I'll be able to stop.”

“I'm sure you've just reached that stage.” Mizuo smiled.

Is everything just a “stage” for Mizuo? All these things inside me, and his being with me?

Isn't he excessively gentle because he's excessively cold?

I have no idea what's coming, and if I love him any more than I do now, I'll probably become completely transparent.

What will happen to us as we begin our new life together?

And yet . . .

Mizuo's smile still seemed to pierce straight through to my heart, and I had the feeling that this smile was the spitting image of the cold and beautiful night. Even if this night we were spending together and everything else was just going to disappear into the past, that was all right—and it seemed to me that I held this allrightness preciously in my hands, and that it was glittering there. Just like the time I'd spent with Haru.

At any rate, I'd probably never hear that singing voice again, that voice so lovely it made you shudder: suddenly I understood this. And that alone made me feel terribly sad.