“No, I can’t.” I shook my head and refused to look back at him. I didn’t want to see the look on his face or think about what we’d done. I could stil taste him on my lips and feel him inside me, and I wanted to sob.

“So… that’s it then?” Loki asked.

“I told you that last night was al we could have,” I said.

“That you did.” He breathed deeply. “I guess I was hoping that I could change your mind.”

I got out of bed and found my torn panties sticking out from under the dust ruffle. The bed creaked as Loki got out after me. I turned back to face him. He’d puled on his pants, but he hadn’t worn a shirt here.

“You’l have to sneak back to your room,” I told him. “Nobody can see you.”

“I know,” he nodded. “I’l be careful.”

We stood there, staring at each other and not saying anything.

There were only a few feet between us, but it felt like miles. There was so much that I wanted to say but couldn’t. Any words would only make it worse.

If I said aloud how much last night had meant to me, it would make it too real.

Loki walked toward the door but stopped next to me. His hands were baled up into fists, and I could see him struggling with something. Without saying anything, he grabbed me suddenly and puled me toward him.

He kissed me so passionately, my knees felt weak. I wasn’t sure I would be able to stand when he let go, but I did.

“That was the last time,” I breathed when we stopped kissing.

“I know,” he said simply. Then he let go of me and walked out of the room.

As soon as he was gone, I folded my arms across my chest, hugging myself. My stomach lurched, and I was certain I would throw up for a moment, but it passed. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. I repeated it over and over in my head, but I couldn’t use my own persuasion on myself. I reached behind me and grabbed onto the bedpost, afraid that my legs would give out.

What had I done? To Loki? To Tove? To myself?

“Princess?” Duncan knocked on the door, but I couldn’t form the words to answer him. The lump in my throat was too great.

“Princess?” He opened the door, and I did my best to compose myself. “Wendy, are you okay?”

“Yes.” I nodded and swalowed back tears. “I’m tired.

Yesterday was too much.”

“Yeah, I know,” Duncan said. “I slept like the dead, but I had al these weird dreams about banging noises. Did you hear anything last night? My room was right next to yours.”

“No,” I shook my head. “Sorry.”