It sounded awful, as if the woman were a prostitute or something. ‘You shouldn’t tell me things like that; he might not want me to know.’ And I don’t want to know about the size ten models he’s escorting round London, either. Particularly when he’d told her that he didn’t have either relationships or cheap affairs with women.

‘Oh, but I must. We’ve just been watching this film where a little boy rings up a radio station, trying to find a wife for his dad.’

‘I know the one.’ Thea’s heart sank. If Ben found out about this that babysitter would never work again.

‘Donna said I should ring you.’

‘Well, you shouldn’t. I mean, of course you can ring me for a chat, but you mustn’t start matchmaking.’

‘What’s that?’

‘Trying to get people together with other people. Your Aunt Molly does it with me and it drives me mad. People want to find their own people. You probably wouldn’t like it if someone said, “Go and play with Tommy, he’s a really nice little boy and you’ve got lots in common.”’

‘Teachers do that all the time.’

‘Oh. Well, isn’t it irritating?’

‘Yes, but this is important. I mean Dad goes out with these women that he chooses and they’re crap!’

‘Toby!’ It was probably the babysitter again. They had a lot to answer for… she seemed to remember one in the film Toby had just watched.

‘He doesn’t choose anyone I like.’

‘Why should he? He’s a free agent.’

‘What?’

‘I mean, he can go out with who he likes. You don’t have to like them too.’

‘But I do if they’re going to be my stepmother.’

‘Well, of course, that would be different –’

‘And the women he chooses would be crap as mothers.’

Thea, not at all certain of the parentally approved way to proceed, cleared her throat. ‘You have a mother, Toby, and she’s special to you. No one your dad went out with, or married or anything, would ever be as good as her.’ Thea was proud of herself. She sounded adult and sensible, like an agony aunt.

‘But my mother’s no good as a mother. I mean,’ he went on quickly, before Thea could protest again, ‘she doesn’t make cakes.’

Thea took a bite of toast and crunched it to give herself time to plan her reply. ‘There’s a whole lot more to being a mother than making cakes. Even I know that.’

‘But we have cake sales at school. I want to bring a cake to one.’