Mum’s face – it was as if something had cracked inside her, thought Izzie. It wasn’t as if Em was particularly vain, but Izzie had switched on the family PC more than once to find that Mum had been googling this Charlotte woman, so she obviously felt pretty competitive about her. The fuss she always made about her appearance whenever Dad had brought Michelle round, you’d have thought the Queen was coming for tea. Clearly she would have liked a bit more notice to prepare for the Other Woman this time too. ‘Right,’ she’d said weakly. ‘I’ll come down. Actually, can we just have a word in private first?’

Izzie had hung her head. George hadn’t looked at her once, she realized as Mum went out of the room, closing the door behind her. How embarrassing this was. How excruciating!

She dialled her dad’s number, wishing that an enormous sinkhole would appear under the cottage and destroy it all in an instant. Make this nightmare end. ‘Hi, it’s me,’ she said miserably when he answered.

‘Izzie! About time! I’ve been going out of my mind here. Are you all right? I couldn’t believe my ears when Louise—’

‘Dad – stop. Let me speak,’ she begged before he went off on one. ‘Dad, it wasn’t true,’ she said in the next breath. ‘What Louise told you – it didn’t happen. Nothing happened.’

That took the wind out of his sails. ‘What?’ She could tell he was frowning. He had such bushy eyebrows, her dad; she and Jack were always taking the mick out of him for them. Now she could practically hear them crashing together. ‘What do you mean? Look, you don’t have to cover up for him, love. If he has laid a finger on you . . .’

‘He hasn’t. He really hasn’t,’ Izzie said. She could hear footsteps on the stairs and Seren singing a Disney song at the top of her voice. At least someone was happy. ‘Dad – please, take no notice of what Louise said. It was just a stupid joke to my friends. I swear. Nobody else was meant to see it.’

He didn’t like being in the wrong, ever. If he was answering a football quiz show on the radio and said the wrong answer, he’d immediately go all defensive and make excuses. They phrased the question misleadingly! How was anyone meant to know that? Sometimes even: Where do they get these facts from? Out of the presenter’s backside?

He was silent now, pondering. ‘Dad?’ she prompted. ‘There’s nothing to worry about.’ From where he was sitting, anyway. Izzie had plenty to worry about, thanks to her own stupid attempts to impress. ‘So you can call off the troops, okay? Stand down. George has done nothing wrong.’

‘Right,’ he said gruffly. ‘Well, if he does . . .’