Timothy’s last thought, as he stumbled to the floor, choking and gushing, was: she had a hacksaw all the time.

*  *  *

Todd ran into his motel room. He threw the library book on the desk and, without stopping to take his coat off, sat down with his reading copy. Now there were two All My Colors in front of him: his copy, brand new, slightly used, printed by Franklyn and Sullivan and with the words BY TODD MILSTEAD prominently displayed on the cover and spine; and the library copy, at least a decade old, battered if not well-thumbed, printed by The Whitney Press, and credited to JAKE TURNER.

Todd looked at the Jake Turner version of All My Colors. It was an unsettling experience, like seeing Spock from Star Trek with a beard, or one of those British Beatles albums with the wrong name. There was nothing wrong with the actual book; if it was a forgery, it was an amazing one (but what’s to forge, Todd’s mind asked, there’s only me thinks it exists).

Maybe, Todd thought desperately, this isn’t my book. Maybe it just has the same title. Like when two movies come out with the same title (Todd couldn’t actually think of two movies that had come out with the same title, but he was sure it happened). He remembered, from a long-ago seminar on the English comic novel, that when P.G. Wodehouse had written a book called French Leave, he had jokingly said that he hoped it would be the best book written called French Leave. Todd had never seen French Leave by P.G. Wodehouse or anyone else but he did have both versions of All My Colors. He opened them at the same time.

Chapter One, page one.

Todd’s All My Colors began:

The hardware store was empty. Jimmy the store clerk was clearing away some boxes when he noticed the woman standing at the counter. She was in her early thirties, good-looking with blonde hair and wearing a blue print dress.

Jake Turner’s All My Colors began:

The hardware store was empty. Jimmy the store clerk was clearing up boxes when he noticed the woman standing at the counter. She was in her early ’30s, blonde and good-looking in a blue print dress.

Todd picked a page at random—106—and compared again. Todd’s page 106 began:

and, when Helen asked, Harry just said no.

“Why not?” she asked.

“Honey, there’s no why not,” said Harry. “Because there’s no why.”

Jake’s page 106 began:

and, when Helen raised her head to ask, Harry said no.

“Why not?” she asked.

“Honey,” said Harry. “There’s no why not. Because there’s no why.”