This one wasn't overtly odd. She just left me unsettled. She seemed to know things about me. She asked the "right" questions, almost as if she was searching for something. It was like she had part of a story and was trying to complete the picture—which, as I came to find out, was exactly the case. What made her different from the rest of my online disasters was that I couldn't just chalk her up to a "well, that was weird" kind of experience. No, this woman actually changed the course of my life. Because of her, I discovered that everything I thought I knew about my family was wrong. There was a whole history I was unaware of. And at times I wished it had stayed that way, because the multitude of sins of my ancestors had come home to roost—right on my shoulders.

*****

I suppose when you reach your late-thirties and you haven't been married, you start to panic a bit. After all, guys have biological clocks too. I wasn't into the bar scene and I had one of those jobs that didn't put me into contact with a lot of new people. I wasn't religious, so church get-togethers were completely foreign to me. Everyone always wants to give advice to single people. Usually it is some form of "You've got to get out more. Go to shows, or art exhibits. Meet people." Those comments are usually made by people already entrenched in a relationship. But in reality, it's just not that easy, and once you come to the conclusion that none of your friends are going to introduce you to someone, you begin to evaluate your options. Which usually leads to online dating.

There is nothing intrinsically wrong with online dating sites. You hear about the occasional tragedies, but those occurred from the old-style newspaper personal ads as well. If someone is sick, they will use whatever means are at their disposal. You also hear about the success stories of online dating, although not as much. They're not as newsworthy, so they usually show up in the ads for the site. But for most people online dating is just an endless series of unfulfilling matches. Always hopeful, they switch from one site to another, but the result is the same. Occasionally they will get tired and decide to give it up, and then another site will come along offering a new unique approach, guaranteed to help them find their soul-mate. The "three months for the price of one" deal is the clincher, and the cycle begins anew.

For me, it was Wottacatch.com. I had tried all of the sites that ask you a million questions and then email you someone "exactly" suited to you. Wottacatch.com was different. It was a throwback to the first dating sites, the ones that just showed your picture with some self-composed asinine bio that you considered funny or sexy, but really wasn't. I didn't want a computer making the match for me. I liked looking at all the pictures and imagining myself with some of the women. On the other hand, being a little balding—and self-conscious about it—made me question whether I wanted my picture out there for all to see. Other than my hair shortage though, I really wasn't all that bad looking: almost six feet tall and not overweight—not that I would be a poster boy for a gym ad though. My only distinguishing characteristic, I suppose, was a slightly crooked nose, the result of being on the wrong side of a door that was flung open when the lunch bell rang one day during high school. Part of my family tradition of being in the wrong place at the wrong time.