Nina wondered whether she should go and try to help but she couldn’t quite tear herself off the dance floor, the stirring, sultry beat slipping through her veins, her body moving now of its own volition. She was gripped by a sudden inspiration! I should do our dance! The one we made up when we met! That will distract everyone!

Jules must’ve had the same idea because she was approaching the dance floor at speed. ‘Jules! Jules!’ Nina shouted, jumping up and down. ‘Let’s do the lift! Let’s do the lift! No, you go back!’ She gestured, shooing her away as she giddily hopped backwards to give herself a good run-up. She adopted an athlete-on-the-starting-line pose, her dress riding up further to reveal her knickers, and began to run, the dance floor seeming to elongate as she did. The more she pumped her arms, the further away Jules seemed, but soon Nina was upon her and Nina was so happy! So happy in that moment, to be there at Ted and Alice’s wedding! So fucking happy!

She felt herself lift into the air as she vaulted towards Jules, heard the slit of her dress finally ripping as a rush of cool air met her knicker-line, and saw a look of sheer panic on Jules’s face. Then it was over.

*

Alice felt as though she was in a dream. It had happened. She was married. Officially and now romantically. She shrugged off her feelings earlier as pre-wedding nerves, giggled with Ted about Nina’s antics on the dance floor as they walked together to their suite. ‘Shhhhhhhhhhh,’ he said, putting his finger to her lips and sweeping her up to carry her over the threshold of their room. Ted had seemed happier and happier as the day wore on, relief wreathed around his eyes after the ceremony, after the speeches, after the numbers on the dance floor had dwindled, and he had ended up in the hotel bar with Alice’s father and brothers, where they’d spent the last few hours.

He carried her into their suite but tripped, and she fell, and they landed on the carpet in a heap together. Fat tears gathered in Alice’s eyes as she laughed and they wriggled to face each other. Her tears quickly misted to drunk lust as Ted put both hands on her cheeks and kissed her, his kiss laced with whisky and salt. She tried to extract herself from her dress, winding her arms round to undo the bodice.

‘Allow me,’ said Ted, kissing her neck and flipping her over on to her front. They both chuckled, surprised by the smoothness of the move.

‘Mrs Astor,’ he murmured, kissing her shoulders, and Alice thought it was the sexiest thing she’d ever heard.

‘I like it,’ she said.

Ted took one look at the intricate lacing and decided to leave the dress on.

Ten minutes later it was done.

Welcome to the rest of your life, Alice thought happily as she fell asleep face down on the carpet of Le Crillon, Ted tangled beside her.