Understandably enough, even though we were supposed to be establishing a truly Christian classless society, the (sometimes missing) heels under the dyed coats and battle-dress tunics of most of the men there involuntarily clicked together when confronted by the spruce civilian appearance of the major general, who had by no means lost his military air. But the women, of course, were instantly on his side. In the shattered Wehrmacht, he had been one of the youngest officers of his rank, he had garnered the Iron Cross with Oak Leaf, plus swords, diamonds, WACs, and crab lice, and his blue eyes radiated a zest to share in the reconstruction of Germany with the same spunk and dash that had brought him high military distinction.

So overcoming our resistance, ponderously loaded down with resentment, was only a matter of minutes. “A good troop leader,” as Nagel said appreciatively; he did not dislike the major general but actually found him quite agreeable. Even though Nagel had gotten no further than sergeant with the Close Combat Clasp and the German Cross in Gold, he was treated by Baron von Neunteuffel with a certain officers’-club camaraderie; from now on, it was really a dialogue between initiates, which Hertzog as the consulting egghead could gently steer.

So, anyway, Hertzog delivered his paper: a summary of the jointly worked-out ideological principles (“I would especially like to thank—next to our friend Nagel, of course—Fräulein Ute Seelsorge for her tireless . . .”). The possibilities of practical realization under the given circumstances. Serious doubts, objections, corrections (“I do not wish to fail to express my thanks to a certain friend for his caustically humorous but often for that very reason animating insertions; in our new society, we must also make a place for an Eulenspiegel”). And many thanks for everyone’s sincere comradely cooperation, especially the ever-improving distillers of the helpful turnip schnapps (hahahahaha!). Also many thanks to the detergent industrialist Witte, the true host and owner of the rubble property, who has so far been absent from our circle of friends because the all too slow denazification commission has unfortunately not yet enabled him to add the no doubt valuable intellectual contributions of an experienced industrial leader. And in general, many thanks to a kindly providence, which has preserved us from annihilation and allowed us to find one another here in these makeshift quarters, as the primal cell of a new society that far from neglecting tried-and-true human wisdom actually wishes to continue it. Per aspera ad astra! Let that be our motto evermore!

Bravo! Be seated! The women have already begun, at their own initiative, to embroider a club banner (unfortunately, silver yarn is still scarce, but sperm threads will do nicely for the moment). We thank Herr Speaker for his warm, lucid words. The newcomer, Herr von Rönnekamp, in particular, can probably not help being moved at the mention of so many warm, gay feelings. With special joy and expectation, we now greet our guest. Major General Baron Waldemar von Neunteuffel (stop scratching your flea bites, Fritz!)—