‘And—’ Lord Ashford raised a finger ‘—provided that you don’t expect me to get on stage and make a fool of myself.’

Ray smiled. ‘Certainly not.’

As he turned to leave, his Lordship stopped him. ‘You know, Maguire, I sometimes think the whole of one’s life is like a performance. People come and go, there are moments of excitement, comedy and tragedy and if you’re lucky, happy times and people to love. And when the curtain finally comes down, you just hope it’s all been worthwhile and …’

‘… that you’ve put on a good show, Sir?’ Ray finished.

His Lordship looked at him and something flashed between them, an understanding. ‘Exactly,’ he said.

Bill looked disappointed now, facing Ray. ‘Oh, the concert,’ he said. ‘I thought you were getting to know her. I’ve always thought you liked Miss Hoity Toity.’

‘I do not like Miss Hoi—’ Ray stopped himself and put his glass down. Why did everyone think he had a soft spot for Charity? Maggie had teased him once or twice about her too. ‘Bill, listen to me, Charity—’ he said her name quietly ‘—is a very nice girl. But she’s not for me.’

He glanced at the bar to check the girls hadn’t overheard. Maggie was saying something to Charity which made them both roar. It made him smile too.

‘It’s ’er then, isn’t it?’ Bill said. ‘Maggie?’

‘Sshhh.’

‘Don’t think I haven’t noticed, Raymondo, old chum. I know you moved your desk six inches to the left so you could see her chair better from yours.’

Ray’s face went hot. ‘You’re imagining things, pal,’ he said. But the truth was, he had done that. Blimey, if Bill had guessed, it must be obvious to everyone. As plain as the nose on your face, as his old ma would say.

‘I say, Bill,’ he said, rapidly changing the subject, ‘here’s a joke for you. A man walks into the records office and asks to change his name. The clerk isn’t keen to help but he asks his name and the man replies, “My name is Adolf Stinkfoot …”’

An hour and two pints later, they were still at the table. The fire in the grate had gone out and Ray was daydreaming.

‘Penny for ’em?’ Bill asked. ‘Come on, tell your Uncle Bill all about it.’

‘I was only thinking that I still haven’t got any further with the mysterious case of Miss Barbour’s stolen money.’

‘What?’ Bill cupped his hand around his ear.

Honestly, Bill could be dense – and deaf – sometimes.

Ray leaned across the table and yelled into his ear. ‘I said, isn’t it a shame about Pam’s lost nicker?’

Bill spluttered, sending beer all over the table and Ray’s shirt. ‘What? Pam’s lost knickers?’