“I tried. At least at first. Until I started attending suffragist meetings last year.” She paused as an unexpected smile came over her. “I’ve never been so inspired than while watching those fiercely intelligent ladies demanding to be treated as the equal of any man. I learned so much from them. Of a life beyond what I had ever dreamed was possible.” She pressed her lips together and swallowed. “I invited my friend Abigail to come with me once, but she told Uncle Alfred instead. He was horrified and put a stop to all of it, claiming the meetings weren’t safe. That some of the women were radicals—which they were—but I wasn’t in any danger. Later he admitted he was worried about how it would affect my reputation, as no man in his right mind would want to marry such an ‘unnatural’ woman.”

In the darkness Alec let out a low curse.

“After that it was back to the same routine of tea dances and afternoon calls. Of trying to entertain men who couldn’t be bothered to hide their desire for my money.” Beside her Alec moved to grip his knee. “But then there was some awful business with Ceril Belvedere last spring.” She shuddered at the memory of his forceful kiss and absently touched her lips. “He did not take my rejection of his proposal well. And yet, I’m called a jilt. A tease.” She couldn’t keep the indignation out of her voice.

“I am sorry for that,” Alec said. “It was badly done on his part, and certainly not your fault. Any fool could see that.”

His words swirled around her heart. No one had ever said anything against Ceril’s behavior, not even her uncle. All his ire had been directed squarely at her for rejecting such a “worthy” suitor. Then Lottie frowned. “You know about Ceril? I thought you hadn’t spoken about me with my uncle.”

“I didn’t learn of it from him, but yes,” he admitted after a breath. “I did know.”

There was something hidden in that pause. Something he was hesitant to reveal. And if she pushed too hard now, she might never learn the truth. Luckily, Lottie had grown quite adept at waiting these last five years.

“But believe me,” he continued, his voice sterner now. “Things can be so much worse for you.”

He was right. The trouble was, Lottie simply didn’t care anymore. Her voice rose with each word, rough and urgent. “I can’t end up in some loveless society marriage pretending that everything is fine when it so obviously isn’t. I won’t do it. There is too much to lose.”