Alec couldn’t even think the words. He pulled away from her and pressed his forehead to the wall. He took a deep breath, then another, and another, until his heart rate was close to normal. “My protection may mean nothing to you.” Lottie began to protest, but he plowed on: “But if anything ever happened to you because of me, I would…I would…” He could not will himself to say the rest.

In all the years he had been doing this, he had never had to consider anyone else’s safety besides his own before. Now her very life could be in danger because of choices he had made.

It was simply too much.

Lottie placed her hand on his wrist. He was trembling. “You would what?” she said softly, pressing her thumb against his flesh.

Alec turned his head toward her but kept his other hand fixed firmly to the doorjamb. She watched him closely, those green eyes were searching for something. Desperately. A very large part of him wanted her to find it. To find him once again. Alec dug his nails into the worn wood frame. It began to splinter under the weight of his worry. And his want.

“I don’t know.” His mind buzzed with a hundred different thoughts and fears, each one worse than the last. “Christ, Lottie,” he whispered, harsh and urgent. “I don’t even know.”

She leaned in a little closer until her scent mingled with the charged air between them. But just as her lips parted, the door of his flat swung open.

Rafe Davies, fellow intelligence agent, occasional flatmate, and the closest thing Alec had to a friend these days filled the doorway with a delighted grin on his face. “Terribly sorry to interrupt, but I got tired of waiting for you to come inside.”

Alec recovered from his surprise and immediately tucked Lottie behind him. “You’re supposed to be in Egypt.”

Rafe ignored his sharp tone. “Change of plans. You know how it is.” He shrugged and peered over Alec’s shoulder. An easy enough task, considering he was several inches taller. “Hello, there,” he said to Lottie, flashing her a dazzling smile. “I’m Rafe. And who might you be?”

“Don’t answer that,” Alec growled, then he grabbed Lottie’s hand and pulled her into the flat.

Unease rippled through his body as Alec stalked across the flat’s receiving area and through the large, light-filled parlor. He didn’t stop until he reached his bedroom door and flung it open. Anyone with half a brain could guess what they had been on the verge of doing.

A mistake.

“Go inside and wait for me,” he murmured.