‘I’ve never really looked at it like that,’ Grace said, letting her gaze fall now on the candle between them on the table. Ellis was looking at it too and so she figured he couldn’t really pass comment about the eye contact thing.

‘Why the heck not?’ he asked, his New Yorker accent seeming stronger all of a sudden.

‘Because … I don’t know, it’s not exactly something everyone needs to know about and, like you said, it’s damn hard work,’ she ventured, unsure from being put on the spot, but it was an answer at least.

‘Oh, I see. So it’s modesty. You’re doing a good thing, but must keep quiet about it in case people think you’re humble-bragging.’

‘Well, not exactly. I can’t just leave my mother on her own … someone has to look after her.’

‘Then tell me, because I honestly think you should be proud of yourself. What you do is amazing. I don’t think I could do it and I hope I’m never put in a position where I have to find out. But why don’t you talk openly about it? I imagine your mother appreciates you caring for her very much.’

Silence followed as Ellis waited for Grace to talk to him some more.

‘I might keep quiet about it because …’ She let her voice fade away.

‘Go on,’ he prompted.

‘Well, it might be because my mother can be very difficult and very unappreciative.’ There, she had actually said it out loud.

‘Grace, I’m sorry to hear that. In what way is she difficult?’ He raised his eyebrows.

‘Yes, I know it must be very hard for her with nothing to do except lie in bed all day watching TV, but she can be very ungrateful,’ Grace said quietly. ‘And unkind. Hurtful even,’ she added when Ellis didn’t say anything. He just listened, his eyes softening when she glanced up from the candle to look at him, wondering if she was saying too much, but he seemed interested. Really interested. And so she added in almost a whisper, ‘The stuff she says to me makes me feel utterly rubbish about myself. She knows all the buttons to push to make me doubt my capabilities, appearance, morals … everything. And it makes me feel ashamed.’

‘Oh Grace, that’s terrible, and it would be wrong of me to criticise your mother, so I won’t. But I will say that you must try not to let her manipulation and controlling behaviour define you. I imagine she is jealous of you and that’s her problem.’

‘But she’s my mother. I can’t just abandon her.’