The sun was dazzling, of course, making my vision filmy, and the streets were so crammed with everyone singing and cheering and waving flags, so I know I was mistaken. It couldn’t possibly be Jimmy, as I know that he’s gone, but I definitely saw a chap who looked just like him. Black curls the colour of treacle and green eyes, just like our darling Lara. So much so that it near took the wind right out of me and I stopped up short suddenly, almost making the conga line topple over on top of me. Bunty took the brunt of it, with being behind me, and wasn’t at all pleased on smudging her newly applied red lipstick on the back of my tea dress, and catching her hair on a button, making her victory roll tumble free all over her face in a terrible mess. She looked such a fright that she then had to hastily redo it all in the Lyons Corner House on the Strand, where Joyce’s cousin, Edie, works as a Nippy, and so was able to quickly chivvy her through to the staff room. By the time I had checked on poor Bunty and let Giovanni know where we were headed to, Jimmy’s ghost was nowhere to be seen and I missed my chance to go closer to him. I would have done anything to be near him one more time. I couldn’t sleep last night for dreaming about Jimmy. We were back on the carousel at the fair on Blackheath, only this time our sweet baby Lara was in Jimmy’s arms and his face was a picture as he gazed down at her adoringly. It was around then that I woke up and felt tears on my pillow.

Oh poor Jimmy. I’m so sorry you had to go, my darling, and I know that seeing you was a vision, a mirage of wishful thinking, the celebratory champagne I’d had at the Rainbow Corner club earlier playing games with my head, no doubt. But you gave your life to this dastardly war so it’s only fitting that you should be there on the day we celebrated Hitler’s demise, if only in my imagination and dreams. You will always be my first love, my darling sweetheart, even though Giovanni is my truelove now. Meeting him has made the dark cloud lift and the light in my life come back on, and I know that he will adore Lara as soon as Mother agrees to let me bring her back to London, and it will be safe for her now so there really is no reason for Mother to object.