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Kate pulled out a piece of paper, unfolded it, and handed it to Lyda. That‘s a copy of the note that was found taped to the wheel of Wayne‘s pickup.
Lyda read it. It took her a lot longer than it should have, as if she was reading it over and over again.
Is that Wayne‘s handwriting, Lyda?
I—I don‘t know. It‘s just printing, isn‘t it. Anybody could have written that. Her hand dropped and she stared over Kate‘s shoulder with blank eyes, the note fluttering to the floor.
Kate stooped to pick it up. Did he have any other friends here in camp? No. Not really.
You remember any of the other guys he drove up with?
Lyda shrugged. It wasn‘t an answer but Kate let it pass for now. Any other friends? Maybe the people he worked with. On jobs like this people who work in the same department tend to hang out together, eat meals together, watch TV together. He didn‘t talk about anyone in particular. She sighed. But then it was like pulling teeth to get him to talk about himself anyway. He wanted to know about me. Her lip trembled. First time I ever met a guy who asked me questions about myself, and actually listened to the answers. You know?
Kate was a woman. She knew.
The thing is, he seemed to be cheering up a little, the longer he was here. At first he wouldn‘t talk at all about the future, but lately we‘d been talking about traveling somewhere together on our week off. Seattle, maybe, or Hawaii.
Kate frowned. That certainly didn‘t square with the note on the steering wheel, but then suicides weren‘t famous for thinking linearly. Why did you pretend not to know him?
Lyda picked at a hangnail. Pretty obvious I didn‘t know him. I sure didn‘t know he was going to walk out into the woods so he could lay down and die. She glanced up at Kate. Even the elders don‘t do that anymore.
Kate persisted. But you didn‘t want me to know you were friends. Why not? Lyda looked out the window of that stark, bare little room and sighed. I don‘t know. Before, we were just getting to know each other. A small camp like this is such a hot house, there‘s nothing to do except gossip about what everyone else is doing. I‘ve made that mistake before. I didn‘t want to make it again, so we didn‘t spend time alone where other people could see. She was silent for a moment. Now, if he really did this . . . I don‘t think I want anyone to know that I could be friends with such a—
Such a what?
She turned her head and Kate was surprised to see the beginnings of anger in the other woman‘s eyes. Such a loser.
For the moment, Kate was silenced.
They repacked the duffel and the daypack and returned them to the storage room. Lyda had recovered most of her self-possession, although now and then she would take in a deep breath, blink hard, and let it out on a long, slow exhale. What did you want to see next, Ms. Shugak?