Now it’s all clear to me . . . These children love each other . . . (Pauses and passes her hand over her face) What then? So much the better . . . God grant them happiness! (Laughing) And I . . . What was I thinking? . . . (Pauses again) She just blurted it out . . . I must say, I never even suspected . . . I must say, this news stunned me . . . But wait, it’s not over yet. My God . . . what am I saying? What’s the matter with me? I don’t recognize myself. What have I come to? (Pause) What am I doing? I want the poor girl to marry . . . an old man! . . . I send the doctor . . . he figures it out, drops hints . . . Arkady, Rakitin . . . But I . . . (She shudders and suddenly raises her head) But what is it, then? Am I jealous of Vera? Am I . . . am I in love with him? (Pause) So you still doubt it? You’re in love, wretched woman! How it happened . . . I don’t know. As if I swallowed poison . . . Suddenly everything’s broken, scattered, swept away . . . He’s afraid of me . . . Everybody’s afraid of me. What am I to him? . . . What need does he have for a creature like me? He’s young, and she’s young. And me! (Bitterly) How can he appreciate me? They’re both stupid, as Rakitin says . . . Oh! I hate that know-it-all! And Arkady, my trusting, kind Arkady! My God, my God, let me die! (Gets up) I must be losing my mind. Why exaggerate! Yes . . . I’m stunned . . . It’s amazing, this is the first time . . . I . . . yes! the first time! I’m in love now for the first time! (Sits down again) He must go. Yes. And Rakitin, too. It’s time I came to my senses. I made one misstep—and here I am! This is what I’ve come to. What do I like about him? (Ponders) So this is it, this terrible feeling . . . Arkady! Yes, I’ll escape into his arms, I’ll beg him to forgive me, to protect me, to save me. Him . . . and no one else! All others are strangers to me and must remain strangers . . . But isn’t . . . isn’t there some other way? This girl—she’s a child. She could be mistaken. The whole thing is childish . . . Why am I . . . I’ll have it out with him myself, I’ll ask him . . . (Reproachfully) Ah? You still hope? You still want to hope? And what am I hoping for? Dear God, don’t make me despise myself!

She lowers her head into her hands. Rakitin enters from the study, pale and alarmed.