“Once upon a time there was a little train,” reads Ove, with all the enthusiasm of someone reciting a tax statement.

Then he turns the page. The three-year-old stops him and goes back. The seven-year-old shakes her head tiredly.

“You have to say what happens on that page as well. And do voices,” she says.

Ove stares at her.

“What bloo—”

He clears his throat midsentence.

“What voices?” he corrects himself.

“Fairy-tale voices,” replies the seven-year-old.

“You swored,” the three-year-old announces with glee.

“Did not,” says Ove.

“Yes,” says the three-year-old.

“We’re not doing any bloo—we’re not doing any voices!”

“Maybe you’re no good at reading stories,” notes the seven-year-old.

“Maybe you’re no good at listening to them!” Ove counters.

“Maybe you’re no good at TELLING THEM!”

Ove looks at the book, very unimpressed.

“What kind of sh—nonsense is this anyway? Some talking train? Is there nothing about cars?”

“Maybe there’s something about nutty old men instead,” mutters the seven-year-old.

“I’m not an ‘old man,’” Ove hisses.

“Clauwn!” the three-year-old cries out jubilantly.

“And I’m not a CLOWN either!” he roars.

The older one rolls her eyes at Ove, not unlike the way her mother often rolls her eyes at Ove.

“She doesn’t mean you. She means the clown.”

Ove looks up and catches sight of a full-grown man who’s quite seriously got himself dressed up as a clown, standing in the doorway of the waiting room.

He’s got a big stupid grin on his face as well.

“CLAAUUWN,” the toddler howls, jumping up and down on the bench in a way that finally convinces Ove that the kid is on drugs.

He’s heard about that sort of thing. They have that attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder and get to take amphetamines on prescription.

“And who’s this little girl here, then? Does she want to see a magic trick, perhaps?” the clown exclaims helpfully and squelches over to them like a drunken moose in a pair of large red shoes which, Ove confirms to himself, only an utterly meaningless person would prefer to wear rather than getting himself a proper job.

The clown looks gaily at Ove.

“Has Uncle got a five-kronor piece, perhaps?”

“No, Uncle doesn’t, perhaps,” Ove replies.

The clown looks surprised. Which isn’t an entirely successful look for a clown.

“But . . . listen, it’s a magic trick, you do have a coin on you, don’t you?” mumbles the clown in his more normal voice, which contrasts quite strongly with his character and reveals that behind this idiotic clown a quite ordinary idiot is hiding, probably all of twenty-five years old.

“Come on, I’m a hospital clown. It’s for the children’s sake. I’ll give it back.”

“Just give him a five-kronor coin,” says the seven-year-old.

“CLAAUUWN!” screams the three-year-old.

Ove peers down with exasperation at the tiny speech defect and wrinkles his nose.

“Right,” he says, taking out a five-kronor piece from his wallet.

Then he points at the clown.

“But I want it back. Immediately. I’m paying for the parking with that.”