Saying nothing, Ivy got out an envelope of cocoa so old it was stiff with moisture.

“I date her old boyfriend,” I continued bitterly, “who used to be said master vampire’s scion, and my ex-boyfriend is a professional thief who calls demons and trades information about me for tips to steal artifacts that can start an Inderland power struggle. There’s something wrong when you trust people who can hurt you so badly.”

“It’s not that bad.” Ivy turned with the chipped mug in her hand, head down as she broke chunks of cocoa against the side of the mug with an old spoon.

“Not that bad?” I said with a bark of laughter. “It’s been hidden for five thousand years. Piscary is going to be majorly pissed, along with every master vampire in every city on the entire freaking planet! If we don’t do this right, they’re all going to be rapping on my door.”

“I wasn’t talking about that. I meant about you trusting people who can hurt you.”

I flushed, suddenly wary of her, standing over there at the end of the van in the dark. “Oh.”

The water from the kettle started to steam, blurring her features as it rose. “You need the thrill, Rachel.”

Oh God. I stiffened, glancing at the closed door.

Ivy’s posture shifted irritably, and she flowed into motion. “Get off it,” she said, setting the mug on the tiny counter space and unplugging the kettle. “There’s nothing wrong with that. I’ve watched you ever since we partnered in the I.S. Every guy who tried to date you, you drove away when you found out the danger was only in your imagination.”

“What has that got to do with Nick selling me out to a demon?” I said, my voice a shade too loud for prudence.

“You trusted him when you shouldn’t have so you could find a sense of danger,” she said, her expression angry. “And yes, it hurts that he betrayed that trust, but that’s not going to stop you from looking for it again. You’d better start picking where you find your thrills a little better, or it’s going to get you killed.”

Flustered, I put my back to the wall of the van. “What in hell are you talking about?”

Ivy turned to face me. “Being alive isn’t enough for you,” she said. “You need to feel alive, and you use the thrill of danger to get it. You knew Nick dealt in demons. Yes, he overstepped his bounds when he traded information about you to them, but you were willing to risk it because the danger turned you on. And once you get over the pain, you’re going to trust the wrong person again—just so you can find a jolt in that it might all go bad.”

I was afraid to speak. The scent of cocoa rose as she poured hot water into the mug. Afraid she might be right, I considered it, looking over my past. It would explain a lot. All the way back to high school. No. No freaking way. “I do not need a feeling of danger to get turned on,” I protested hotly.